Sunday Snippet April 17, 2016


Senzu has returned with the knife Wellhym asked her to get.


“Now, tell me, what do you do with a knife?”  He laid it on the ground between them.

“You cut things.”

“What kinds of things?”

“Meat, and fruit, and vegetables, mostly.”

He nodded.  “Have you ever seen anyone accidentally cut themselves with a knife?”

She thought for a moment, then nodded. “They said some bad words.”

Marsden and Kordelm suddenly did not dare look at each other and Wellhym choked back a laugh. “I’m sure they did,” he replied.  “So you know that a knife can hurt someone.”

She nodded.

“Do you think someone could be killed with a knife?”

She studied the knife on the ground for a long moment, then nodded.  “They use them to kill pigs.  Bigger ones than this, though.”

Wellhym nodded.  “Now, I want to show you something.  Don’t be scared, all right?  I promise I’m not going to hurt you or anyone else who’s here.”

She nodded, but took a step back when he drew his sword. She bumped into Marsden and he put a hand on her shoulder to steady her.




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Filed under writing

15 responses to “Sunday Snippet April 17, 2016

  1. Another beautiful scene. So caring. This one was super cute: “They said some bad words.”

  2. Great details. I like how they could hardly keep from cracking up over her candid account of the swearing.

  3. Fun little snippet. Enjoyed their interaction.

  4. You’ve captured her voice really nicely in this scene. And left me wanting to know what’s going to happen next.

  5. Such a sweet scene. Great parenting (assuming Marsden and Kordelm are Senzu’s parents)…having the child think and come up with answers rather than simply telling why the knife is dangerous.

  6. I love how patient they are with her, and you do a great job of capturing her innocent voice without making her sound babyish. Great snippet!

  7. siobhanmuir

    I had a vision of Crocodile Dundee saying, “That’s not a knife…This is a knife.” Great snippet. PT. :)

  8. Excellent! Even though this is the first I’ve read of this, I could see it happening right in front of me.

  9. You can see her learning slowly.

  10. Great scene, you can tell there is care there.

  11. Yep, a sword is just a big knife! :)

  12. Gem

    You’ve created a picture so detailed it’s a moving scene in my imagination. Great writing!

  13. I will forever love this entire scene. It’s so touching and moving and beautiful.

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