Sunday Snippet September 6, 2015

Skipping ahead a bit in Onyx Sun, which is back from two beta readers and in revision.

Taliya has had a frustrating afternoon.  She has had no good luck tracking the slaver that has her lover, Luzita; and the salesman at Vastyne’s didn’t seem too hopeful about her being able to get financing for the ship she had found.


All she wanted to do was break down and cry, but instead she swallowed hard and with shaking hands called her father.

“Taliya.  I was wondering when you were going to call.”


“I’d heard you and your mother are no longer on speaking terms?”

“News travels fast.”

“Come for dinner.”

Taliya was beginning to feel faintly irritated by men telling her what to do and trying to feed her, but there was something in his voice that prompted her to agree.  “All right.”   She hesitated and added shyly, “It will be good to see you again.”

“Taliya…”  He hesitated.  “I’ll see you soon.”











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Filed under writing

9 responses to “Sunday Snippet September 6, 2015

  1. elainecsc2013

    Why the hesitation? Intriguing.

  2. Hmmm. Duelling hesitation. Of course, being in Maureena’s orbit can make anyone hesitant. You’ve captured an element of the father-daughter relationship here.

  3. Why did he hesitate? Can’t wait to find out.

  4. An interesting new development in this intriguing story. Well done excerpt!

  5. I like this–I know what she means about being irritated by men telling her what to do (I had an incident like this last week). (Oh, I’m sorry–did I say that? LOL). Great snippet!

  6. Nope, not going to spill spoilers. (Even if I want to.) I am just going to say that I love his character, and I like how she’s so independent that even accepting (or not so accepting) of the help makes her uncomfortable a bit.

  7. It sounds like bad news to me. On the other hand it’s normal for a dad to want to feed his daughter, damn her mother should have been trying to feed her too.

  8. chellecordero

    I’m wondering if the father is in on some of grandma’s secrets? Curious.

  9. Karen Michelle Nutt

    I wonder what her father was going to tell her. I caught the hesitation. I look forward to finding out. 🙂

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